So, I have been unpacking my books and other totes for the past few hours, looking at old baseball cards, finding photos I forgot I had, along with a plethora of cards, notes, and other mementos that I have apparently kept over the years. With some things, it’s fun to look back and remember the good times. With other things, it’s much harder. For instance, reading the words that someone wrote for me, and at the time not understanding what they truly meant and how that person changed my life drastically without me knowing it at the time. Hindsight is 20/20. Then again, it could be 20/200. I am, of course, grateful for where I am and the people that are in my life. Though, I can’t say that I wouldn’t have changed a couple of small things if I had another chance. But those small things would grow like the wind from the wings of a butterfly. And my future would most likely be unrecognizable. Despite the illogical feelings that pour over when I look at old material, it is nice to see how all the pieces have fit together. It’s nice to know that those people were in your life for that period of time, and the only reason I care so much now is because I cared a lot then. Some people have moved away and some people have passed. I will always be grateful for how they have helped create the life I live now.
When we are young, it is hard to appreciate the present. We know so little about the world and the future, and yet believe we’ve got it figured out. The old road is rapidly fading, as Mr. Bobby Dylan once said. And the times, they are a-changing. It’s never-ending and it can be hard to look back and wonder what-if. That’s why it is so important to live in the present — to appreciate everything and everyone that I have now because one day they will be photographs. They will be birthday cards and postcards and text messages and songs played on repeat. It can be so devastatingly sad to reminisce. But that is only because our lives are filled with so much love. There is balance, like a needlepoint, that the world seems to effortlessly rest upon. It is funny and sad. It is beautiful and disgraceful. It is pain and love. All wrapped up in a nice little box for safekeeping.
But enough with the melancholy drama. It is time for the grand finale. Below, I present to you a letter I wrote to myself in 7th grade to my future self in 12th grade. It is one of the kindest things that our teacher and the school did for us, knowing that five years down the line we would receive this letter in class, waiting for one of the last bells to ring of our high school life, and not remember one bit what the hell was in that envelope until we unfolded the note and read:
Dear Me
We your reading five years later than you wrote it so the hand writing is probably bad. Anyway you looked like well you had red hair, blue eyes, had glasses, and was about 4”7. Your sisters Dana and Jenny are in the tenth grade and Danas 16 and Jennys 15 almost 16. Your sister, Abby is 5 and Aren was just born on the 23 of December. Dad and Karen are still together and Alan and Mom are too. Your best friends are Tim, Steven, and Stephen. Your cat Baily is still alive and also is Katy, Bandit, and Pregen, and your pet gecko Buddy. Right now your playing basketball, the coach stinks and you haven’t won a game. You also are watching the Simpsons right now. Your also reading the book The Relic and are on the 17th chapter. My goals are to pass the 7th grade with all A’s and B’s. Well now I’m suppose to talk about aspirations, but I don’t know what that is. So moving on. Well I feel alot about 7th and 8th grade, but the main things are that 7th grade is pretty fun and is alot harder that 1-6th grades. 8th grade I’m not so sure about. Well I think I’ll do alright and get pretty good grades, but it will be even more harder than 7th grade. I think Algebra is one of the best classes I have because the class is fun and the work isn’t that hard. There is one thing I can think of that should be changed in algebra and that is for Mr. Bates not to be so strict. I see myself in 5 years graduating from the high school of the small town of Chesaning. I see myself in 15 year haveing a good job that pays alot and having a beutiful wife at home waiting for me to get home from work. I hope to achieve alot things like graduating from college and living a long and happy life.
So this is Zach Colston at age 12 almost 13 signing off….
P.S. I’m listening to Chef Aid #10.
Author’s Note #1: The Chef Aid CD track 10 is called Bubblegoose, sung by Wyclef Jean and the boys of South Park (a.k.a. Trey Parker and Matt Stone). Check it out: https://vimeo.com/421069896
Author’s Note #2: I listened to that CD aaaaaa lot.
Author’s Note #3: The handwriting was actually pretty good. It’s funny how I thought it would improve over the years. Can’t say that is true. But the grammar and spelling are certainly better!
